Three BIG Myths of Achieving the Life and Career of Your Dreams
If you are going through a life change—and especially if you are contemplating a big career change—you are about to bump up against some very popular myths. Here goes:
Myth 1. It’s going to require a lot of difficulty and discipline. It surprises me how many people say, “I know it is going to be really, really hard and awful, but I still want to do it!” Honestly, making a career change does not have to be that hard. Does it take some patience and willingness to consider risks? Yes. Is it scary? Yes! But otherwise, the only discipline you will need is to discipline your mind not to believe all of the myths.
Myth 2. You have to find your life purpose and destiny first. Ugh! This is such a prevalent myth. First of all, if we do have a specific “purpose” in life, it is probably not just one; more than likely it is four or five purposes (e.g., parent, defender of the meek, wise advisor, caretaker, risk-taker, etc.). Secondly, what most people in career-change mode are really looking for is to have more meaning and more of a sense of purpose in their work. The first step to finding more purpose for your future is to find it in your past—it’s there. Once you realize you have had lots and lots of meaning already, you can consider the values that are most precious and dear to you—and those values can lead you to a career of much more meaning. But it’s generally a process of discovery—not a black-and-white realization or a sudden epiphany.
Myth 3. You have to make drastic changes. Our culture loves a drastic change. We line up for Hollywood movies where the chef suddenly quits the restaurant, or the Wall Street guy writes a manifesto that gets him fired, or the cop goes rogue and catches the criminal by whatever means necessary. In our own lives it is often the corrosion caused by stress that guides us to make drastic changes like quitting abruptly and divorcing ourselves from our career past. In my experience, the longest lasting and most rewarding career changes tend to have a sense of ecology to them, meaning that people find a way to use (and not waste) their prior experience as they work toward something in the future. Your new life might not make a great movie—but it could be great!
